No more butts! Please!

So can we talk about travel etiquette for a hot minute? I spent most of my day today traveling – I was in and out of several airports and on a couple planes – and by the last leg of my trip, I decided that I’d had ENOUGH of all the BUTTS. Let’s go over a few things, shall we?

I understand the nervous-nellie travelers; those who get to the airport hours early so as not to miss their flight. Hey, I get ya’, I’m not down with missing a flight, either. However, once at the airport, when the departure board has been checked and the gate number has been confirmed, I do not believe in lining up and waiting. Color me crazy, but I think it’s a little rude to stand there with your bottom in someone elses’s face. Someone who is doing exactly what you’re doing – waiting – except in a chair. I understand the whole not-wanting-to sit-when-you’re-going-to-be-sitting-for-three-plus-hours thing and to that I say, Go stand against with your butt against a wall! That’s what I did!

Fast-forward…Now you’re on the plane, comfortably squished in your aisle seat, and the person sitting by the window needs to get up to use the lavatory. No problem there, we’ve all gotta go! But hey, maybe you could just ask your row-mates to get up, rather than CLIMBING OVER THEM. There is hardly enough room to do that in First Class, let alone in Coach! I actually had this happen to me today and the guy who was trying to climb over me was insisting that I stay put, so as not to bother me! Umm, hello, I’m a married lady here. I don’t need ANY butts in my face, let alone a foreign one! Just ask me to move; I am sitting in the aisle seat and am totally prepared for a few ups and downs.

Okay, you’ve survived the flight and enjoyed Monsters v. Aliens (cute movie). However, the door to the plane hasn’t even been opened yet and people! everywhere! are up! with their butts in your face! I think this bugs me most of all. We’re ALL going to need to disembark. We’re ALL going to need to get something from an overhead bin. We’re ALL sick of standing! But what makes these people think they’re so special they can jump up first and just stand there with their suitcase blocking the aisle and their butt in your face? How about we all hold tight for a few minutes and get off the plane in organized little rows and columns, just like [my OCD] God intended.

Well! I don’t know about you, but I feel much better now that I’ve gotten all that off my, err, chest. What about you? What travel issues get your panties in a twist?