I’ve been thinking recently about the Awkward Question Phase and whether or not it ever goes away. Awkward Question Phase, you ask? Yes, you know, like when you’ve been dating someone for an extended period of time and someone (usually someone who has no right to be asking, by the way), asks, “Sooooooooo, when are you guys going to get married?!” Or, when you are married and people (again, people who shouldn’t even be asking), ask, “Sooooooooo, when are you guys going to start having babies?!” I wonder, when I’m 60, are people going to start asking me, “Sooooooooo, when are you going to retire?!” I certainly hope not.
Since Chris and I only dated for a WHOPPING six months before he proposed, I never really had to field The Marriage Question. And although I have had my share of The Baby Question, that is not really the one that bothers me.
It’s the, “Sooooooooo, how’s marriage treating you?!” that’s really getting to me. Sure, it seems innocuous and perhaps you’re thinking I’m just really bitchy and rude for getting annoyed at that question. And perhaps you’re right.
But the thing is, there’s only one socially acceptable way to answer that question and unfortunately, it’s just not in my genetic makeup to answer with that excited, “It’s GREAT! I love it!” And so, I usually just answer with something to the effect of, “Oh, you know, it’s as to be expected after four months…” which I’m sure makes those around me feel a little awkward.
Rest assured, however, that marriage has been wonderful and lovely so far, but given that I just puked a little bit when typing the words “wonderful” and “lovely,” you can understand how I just can’t say them out loud.
Haha. You kill me.
I never understood that questions either. I always wondered what people would do if I said, “We’ve hit a rough patch but we’re working through it.” But instead I always answered, “Its so awesome. We love it.” Which was much more accurate that the first answer… but still, to people who had no business asking me, I always wanted to give them that shocking answer.
And now that I’m prego… I wonder what the next phase of awkward questions will be for us. “When is baby number 2 coming?” Ugh. Let my uterus go back to its intended size first, please!
Ohmygosh! Now that my husband and I have been married for over a year, people no longer ask that question – I guess they don’t want to know what a 1+ year of marriage is like! haha. But yeah, at the time, it was so, so annoying to be asked– SO, how do you like marriage? People are crazy. For realz.
p.s. I mean, obviously I love being married and all that jazz but what if I was annoyed with my hubby that day or what if anything? Then again, I guess the question “how are you?” is the same idea, to a lesser degree. The proper response is always “good, thanks” … it’s always awkward to say “I’m really depressed or mad or whatever today kthanx.” haha
You’ll never stop getting these stupid questions. My hubby and I were married for almost 9 years before we had a baby and I thought if one more person asked me when we were going to have one I might go postal. Now our little babe is just 10 months old and I get asked on a weekly basis when we are having #2. I think I just need to think of a smart ass response and go with that. đ
Just tell them the sex is fucking awesome. They will definitely get the hint after that. Oh, and say thank you. Always be polite. Love, ur Aunt Rach
I have to admit, I’m guilty of asking those questions… but I think I automatically ask them because people always asked me!
And it makes me laugh what Sherm said about talking about a rough patch… because there were sure some times when I wanted to let some explicatives about my husband fly, but instead I answer in a chipper voice, “Oh it is just the best thing ever!”
Hmmmm… wonder if instead of saying, “We are waiting to have another baby for awhile” I should just say, “Well, my ovaries don’t cooperate and my period is abnormal so we do it all the time but those darn sperm just can’t seem to hook up with my eggs!” the next time someone asks me about having a 2nd.
Yeah, I bet that would be the response they were really hoping for… đ
Love the good sage advise from Aunt Rach…well said my dear!!!!!